The I'm Not Dumb But Podcast
Welcome to The I'm Not Dumb But Podcast, where we won't claim to have all the answers to life's deepest questions, but we promise you an exciting journey into the realms of knowledge you never knew you needed!
Join friends Cesar, Rob, Chris and Victor as we dive head first into topics that might be mainstream but not common knowledge. No topic is too taboo for us to explore. Let's get curious together!
The I'm Not Dumb But Podcast
The Unpeeled History of America's Favorite Fruit
On this episode of "The I'm Not Dumb but Podcast," we peel back the history behind America's favorite fruit, the banana! From its ancient beginnings in Southeast Asia to its journey across the oceans to America's pantries. We dive into how this simple fruit has become a household staple in the U.S., and the role of the iconic Chiquita brand in its rise to infamy. Join us as we explore fascinating banana facts and narratives that are sure to surprise and entertain you.
We travel back to the 19th century, where American businessmen faced the daunting challenge of constructing a railroad in Costa Rica. Amidst an unforgiving environment teeming with dense rain forests and diseases, these entrepreneurs stumbled upon an unexpected goldmine—bananas. Discover how planting bananas led to a thriving export business. This segment shines a light on the grit and ingenuity that turned adversity into opportunity, painting a vivid picture of the harsh realities and unexpected triumphs faced by these pioneers.
The United Fruit Company, a key player in the banana trade that shaped Central American economies and politics. Learn about the company's iron grip on infrastructure and local governments, and the dark side of its power, which led to the term "Banana Republics." We'll also discuss the biological vulnerabilities that have threatened banana crops over the years, from the downfall of the Gros Michel to the current threat against the Cavendish. This episode is packed with history, business intrigue, and a touch of humor, offering a comprehensive look at the surprising and often tumultuous story behind bananas.
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What do you think railroads, banana Republic and the Cold War have in common?
Victor:Gwen Stefani, and you'd be correct.
Rob:Yes, Today we're going to be talking about America's favorite fruits. The history is ripe with shady labor practices, overthrown governments and the threat of extinction. I'm Not Dumb, but what's the real story behind bananas?
Cesar:Welcome to the I'm Not Dumb but Podcast, where we won't claim to have the answers to life's deepest questions but we'll give you an exciting journey into the realms of knowledge you never knew you'd either. Might be mainstream, but not common knowledge. From artificial intelligence to conspiracy theories, no topic is too taboo for us to explore. Let's get curious together.
Rob:I'm Rob, your host for today, joined by Cesar. Yo, our boy, victor, what up? And last but not least, chris, hey, yeah. So today we're going to talk about bananas. This shit is bananas B-A-N-A, and I'm still learning the whole word. There's four, it's like Mississippi.
Chris:I never learned to read.
Rob:If you had to take a guess, where do bananas originate from?
Victor:Well, when a husband banana meets a wife banana and they get together. They have a little banana leaf and it grows into a tree and eventually has its own bananas.
Rob:And then that banana goes to college and pays a mortgage, then dies before it ever gets ripe. That's true Without actually realizing its life's goals.
Chris:Yeah, yeah, we're all bananas here.
Victor:Life is depressing.
Rob:So bananas are native to Southeast Asia? What yeah, southeast Asia, oh really.
Victor:Get the fuck out of here.
Rob:It is believed that bananas were domesticated in actually Papua New Guinea around 8,000 BCE. That's before common something Era Before common core. Totally blank, but I'll take your word on it. It's my podcast.
Chris:Don't ever interject on me again, Totally blank.
Rob:but I'll take your word on it it's my podcast. Don't ever interject on me again. Wait, how did they figure this out? So they're like 23 to meet it.
Victor:Yeah, and it was like you're Turkish, but this one was from Papua New Guinea. So they said in New Guinea they domesticated bananas.
Rob:And then that kind of spread to the Philippines and then it was reintroduced to different regions in the area. They believe that just by going through, like history and trades, that bananas arrived in south america around 200 bce, carried by sailors from southeast asia. So the best guess is that the portuguese might have had something to do with this.
Victor:We always have something to do with it, because you know they were transporting goods and you know people at the time. Listen, it's not about what we were transporting or who. Okay, it's about that they got to their destination safely.
Rob:It's like Delta it's all we care about.
Victor:It's more like spirit. I mean, we'll get you there and that's the end of it.
Rob:And that's the end of it. I mean, don't expect more than that.
Chris:The Motel 6 of the sky.
Rob:Currently, more than 100 billion bananas are eaten every year in the world, making the fourth most popular agricultural product. Americans eat an average of 27 pounds of bananas per person every year.
Cesar:Yeah, that sounds about right.
Chris:Those are rookie numbers, yeah, so how many bananas is that? 27 pounds?
Rob:It's like one Toyota Yaris.
Chris:I don't know.
Rob:Three medium-sized bananas weighs one pound.
Victor:I probably do, maybe a pound and like a quarter a week.
Cesar:Oh, wow All right, we eat bananas every week. It's a quarter a week. Oh wow, all right, we eat bananas every week.
Rob:It's a staple. Yeah, yeah. So more than 96% of American households buy bananas at least once a month. Potassium.
Victor:You need it.
Rob:You know it's good for you.
Victor:What are you going to do without it? I need it.
Rob:So how did this fruit well, technically a berry became so wildly popular in American culture today? Technically, a berry became so wildly popular in American culture today. This is where you say what the fuck? It's a berry.
Victor:Oh, I knew it's a berry. You didn't know it was a berry. Everyone knows it's a berry.
Rob:I didn't fucking know it was a berry. I was throwing that in there for you guys to say it's a fucking berry. No, a berry is a raspberry. Okay, bananas are fruit. Fuck that for me, so I'll just skip the definition of a berry.
Victor:It's a berry, yeah.
Rob:So technically, a berry is a simple fleshy fruit that usually has many seeds, such as a banana, grape, melon or orange and a tomato.
Victor:Yeah, tomato's a fruit. Did you know?
Rob:that at least. Yeah, I fucking learned that in like the sixth grade, all right.
Chris:So, I'll just leave it alone. Who brought this?
Rob:guy along. So why is a fruit in?
Chris:Southeast Asia, that got put over in South America, central America. Why are we loving this thing? It's cheap and it tastes good, simple as that.
Victor:Here's my guess Some rich motherfucker in, like the 1800s, loved bananas and he's like I'm going to just bring these in shiploads. He got us all addicted to bananas and ever since then we've been loving bananas.
Cesar:I've never seen a marketing campaign on bananas, because they don't need one.
Victor:Chiquita sells herself. Look how happy she is. Don't you just want a banana? Just looking at her dancing with fruit on her head, is that what it actually looks like?
Chris:Yeah, you don't even know, I think so, yeah, okay, yeah, you don't even know.
Cesar:I think so, yeah, okay, yeah that's exactly it.
Chris:How long has it?
Rob:changed it Now. She's just holding a rifle.
Victor:You better not take it away from her.
Cesar:Did you know that you have rights? The Constitution says you do.
Rob:You guys are all kind of right, but we will start with railroads. So a man named Minor Cooper Keith was a wealthy American businessman. He was running a cattle ranch out in Texas. His uncle had actually just signed a contract with the government of Costa Rica to build a railroad for them. So he goes to his nephew and he's like hey, why don't you guys come with me to Costa Rica? We'll knock out this railroad, we might get rich. There's tons of stuff there. What do you think?
Victor:Hey y'all, come down to Costa Rica with me and we'll build a railroad.
Rob:I think he sounded like North Atlantic. You know, hey, like, why don't you come down to North Carolina?
Victor:or Costa Rica and we'll build a railroad, Like he's announcing a 1920s baseball game. Yes, Now up on the mound, we're going down to Costa Rica to get ourselves some bananas and build a railroad while we're down there, uh that's what I think it sounds like chewing gum jim. What do you think about that?
Rob:he ditched the cows around the 1870s he bounced to costa rica and started making this railroad with his uncle and his brothers. The costa rican government was like we're exporting a lot of coffee beans and we need you to build the railroad from the capital to the shore, so this way we can kind of push everything out to the ports and we can export this stuff nicely. In addition to building this railroad, a lot of American businessmen would go down to Central America because it was pretty much underdeveloped. So they were running into this idea of like, oh, we're going to find a lot of natural resources.
Victor:We can get rich. It sounds like they're going to try to take advantage of these underdeveloped.
Rob:Immediately, you're starting to think what they're thinking of. Right, we'll go down there and build a railroad, but anything else we find we're keeping. Pretty much is the idea.
Victor:That's how it works.
Rob:Well, it turned out. This part of Costa Rica densely thick with rainforests, crazy types of diseases, inclement weather, it was just a nightmare to tear through. The terrain was crazy Trees, rocks, hills, you name it.
Victor:Probably a lot of snakes down there too.
Rob:And they always have these like colorful frogs. You got to watch out for those, the poisonous ones.
Victor:You never know. You're telling me a bunch of fucking dudes over there building a railroad. Didn't lick a few frogs.
Cesar:They probably licked them. I went on a crazy trip, that's why it took them forever.
Rob:Half my workers are on DMT. I can't even get them. All glory to the hypno-dode. It was a rough time. So it was estimated that in the time frame in the early stages of him trying to build his railroad, over 4,000 people died trying to create this thing Even Miner's uncle and all his brothers and they think it was from like malaria disease. I think one guy had a tree fall on him. It was like the Oregon Trail on steroids.
Victor:Malaria was no joke. It kills a lot of people. In 2022, an estimated 608,000 deaths occurred due to malaria.
Rob:Wow. So as the time he was building this thing, he did notice that all over Central America, bananas were growing rampant a vital thing where they would plant banana trees near plantations because the shade would basically right, you know give cover to workers or the slaves, and then, in addition to that, it would give fruit, tons and tons of fruit. It was just cheap food, so cheap shelter, cheap food. So what he did was he started planting bananas near the railroad so, as he was building it, he'd have food and shelter for workers. What a scumbag it's like when you're done with a marathon and they give you that banana in bananas near the railroad. So, as he was building it, he'd have food and shelter for workers.
Victor:What a scumbag. It's like when you're done with a marathon and they give you that banana in the end and you're just like what is this to do with this? There's workers cramping, they're like give that man a banana real quick.
Rob:He needs potassium.
Victor:His productivity is slowing down. Give him that damn banana.
Rob:So he does notice that bananas have potential, so he does start exporting bananas as a side gig. He actually had steamships and he was, uh, exporting these over to new orleans I believe it's called nolans nolans yeah, he said it with your yankee voice oh, you know
Cesar:this is the first time that it's been in the us right no, they're already in the country yeah, but they're probably, like you know, fancy, like exotic, like what's that?
Victor:Oh, this is a banana from the South of America.
Rob:So actually fun fact, this is what happened, he gets down there in the 1870s. On June 5th 1876, at the World's Fair in Philadelphia, pennsylvania, they introduced an exotic yellow fruit. That was the first time they had actually introduced the banana to America. At that same World's Fair, alexander Graham Bell was showcasing what he liked to call the telephone.
Victor:The banana was way better Is that where he got the design from, because he goes look if I put this banana up to my ear.
Rob:Banana phone. So actually the banana was just as popular at the World's Fair than the telephone was, because at the time people were enamored with the fact that you could eat this fresh fruit that came from such a faraway land. So it was kind of popular. People were gaining traction and he began exporting these bananas over. At this point he started shifting gears and he was like listen, I got a railroad, I got a port, I got ships, I got people wanting to buy these things they're getting popular and ultimately used his railroad for strictly pushing bananas to the ports. In addition to this, he starts to face some financial trouble. Costa Rican government defaults on a lot of the money that they said they were going to help him building the railroad. Then the brokerage company from some of the loans that he got in Europe went belly under and he's still trying to get more money, trying to get more money.
Victor:There's always money in the banana stand.
Cesar:I've never heard of that.
Victor:You never heard of that.
Chris:You the banana stand. I've never heard of that.
Victor:You never heard of that you never watched arrested development business pieces, not all of it, oh my god, that's why you're wasted on you.
Cesar:Yeah, wasted on you. References, just completely wasted on you.
Rob:6300 suits come on, what does any business owner do when you can't get any more funding? And you've got got a business but you need money? What he decided to do was go to one of his main competitors and merge with his company. So he goes to Andrew Preston, who was the owner of the Boston Fruit Company at the time, killing it in trade. He was exporting tons of bananas, but exporting them to the Northeast. So they said, hey, listen, you're a huge exporter in the Southeast, I'm an exporter in the Northeast Together. They said, hey, listen, you're a huge exporter in the Southeast, I'm an exporter in the Northeast Together. The United Root Company is born the UFC. The UFC and Dana White had not taken care of it yet.
Cesar:It went from bananas to fighting.
Chris:Yes, who ends it with a spinning elbow?
Rob:At the time it was very powerful. They were the biggest exporters of bananas from Central America. They used their infrastructure and their political power and they went to all these different Central American countries and say, hey, listen, we would like to develop your infrastructure, but in addition to that they would get trade agreements, land tax-free givebacks and all this stuff. So it was kind of a win-win. But really what they were doing was developing their infrastructure and increasing their supply chain for bananas.
Victor:It sounds like they're still like bribing the shit out of people.
Rob:They were able to take over all of Central America Honduras, guatemala, panama, costa Rica, I mean all these countries in this area. United Fruit Company was there, sheesh, they had 93 boats called the Great White Fleet and actually they would transport bananas and tourists Banana tourism. Well, actually people talked about how fun those banana boats were, and that's where the term came from. Look at that. What ended up happening was the United Fruit Company started to become like a state within a state in these countries. Their GDPs were higher than these countries. They had more political power than these countries. They owned large, large, large portions of the land. They owned radio stations, I think. In Guatemala they ran their post office and they would build like telegraph infrastructure and everything. The United Fruit Company in Central America was nicknamed El Pulpo octopus in Spanish, and it was because they had their tentacles in everything. What do people usually do with power?
Victor:They use it responsibly.
Chris:Yes, At some point they have to come down.
Rob:And they came down on the labor force Because they should have worked harder. To be able to have an efficient exporting business, they needed to be able to control the supply chain. So in an effort to do that, they would set up villages for the workers, where they would house the workers.
Victor:That sounds efficient If your workers are always at work.
Rob:They would create commissaries where the workers would buy their food and they even paid them in what we would call Disney tokens, but they called them vouchers. So workers weren't even paid an actual wage, they were paid vouchers and they could only spend those vouchers at the commissaries and with the company United Fruit Company.
Victor:This just sounds efficient, really. I mean listen, why do you need money when the UFC is providing you everything that you need?
Rob:Workers were forced to live in these plantations, working 24-hour shifts, seven days a week. It was great. But when you're put in that position, don't you need a little extra something to get you going, something to just wake you up in the morning?
Chris:Coffee, I don't know.
Rob:Well, coffee and cocaine might work, but some of these camps would actually enslave the wives and daughters to be sex workers, and if they denied it, then the husbands wouldn't be able to get the vouchers.
Victor:Now is this in, like the onboarding pamphlet. Does like HR approach you and be like listen, so welcome to the team. Here's your pamphlet, here's your health insurance. It's through the company, obviously. I mean by through the company, I mean mean our doctors will look at you. You are going to take your wife and children to this. You have how many daughters? Oh, oh, great, there's. We have a special house for them. Well, they will be prostituted out to help the team. You know we're here to boost morale. That's exactly how it?
Victor:went. How's your morale?
Rob:great, and because of that these countries came to be known as Banana Republics. Oh so, by definition of Banana Republic, countries who had unstable governments are exploited for exportation of a limited resource such as bananas.
Victor:So when did they get involved in clothing? That was later.
Rob:No, but why would a? Why would a clothing company decide to name their company Banana Republic, knowing this?
Chris:Right, you sure about?
Rob:that In 1911, honduras, the government wanted to take back some of the land Sounds like communism. The workers actually striked and the politicians, the governments, would go in there and say you're getting back to work and in addition to that, they would give tax breaks to United Fruit Company. So they would squash these strikes and they would keep it moving because they were so politically connected. But this kept happening. In other countries, workers started striking. So one particular year in Colombia in the 1920s, the workers stopped working and they say listen, we want better wages. They had nine things that they wanted and it was regular stuff. It was like working six days a week instead of seven, getting paid actual money instead of vouchers, better work environments you know, regular things that workers would want.
Victor:How bad is a banana work environment?
Rob:workers would want. How bad is a banana work environment? It's pretty bad because you got to think about this. Banana bunches super heavy. Where are they working? Inclement weather, hot, nasty, rainy environments, dangerous, and then they're working constantly.
Victor:Yeah, so it was just like not a good place to work and I also hear that like spiders hide in those banana bunches and I also hear that spiders hide in those banana bunches. Oh, yeah, so they probably get bit a lot by spiders.
Rob:United Fruit Company says well, we have a lot of political power. The US kept wanting banana bunches to come in.
Victor:We're hooked on bananas.
Rob:Yeah, they reached out to some of the political leaders and they were like listen, we got to do something about this. So when the workers started striking and asking for these ridiculous demands, I know right, Where's their work ethic?
Victor:Oh, I want to take a day off. Yeah, it's like the Gen Z of their time. I know right, it was ridiculous.
Rob:In Colombia these workers striked. I think it was like 32,000 workers, Sheesh that's a lot. So they go to the US government and they say seems like some very Marxist intentions are going on in Colombia. It sounds like it. So the Colombian government says we don't want the US here, we're going to go ahead and intervene. And they gathered up their military to go and stop these strikes.
Victor:You'd think, though, they hired, like what'd you say? 32,000? And, like you're telling me, like no one from the army like knew who they were Exactly Jose, is that you?
Rob:Right. So how do you detach these workers from their own people? You?
Victor:call them communists.
Rob:A red scare you just shoot them down. That's one way to stop them. So they gave him these raises and the day of one of the strikes, military goes in there and slows, horns and says you have one minute to clear out. You think 32,000 people can clear out in one minute. They didn't, and the Colombian government just opened fire on their own people, killing over 3,000 people in one day. They called it a banana massacre. A banana massacre.
Victor:Is that what they called it?
Rob:Yeah, the banana massacre of 1920. And even the government left nine bodies in the villages to show one body for every demand.
Victor:They asked for Hard negotiators, that's messed up.
Rob:1950s Guatemala there was a new political leader coming in, jacobo Arbenz, and he was actually democratically elected and he goes. We want to pull all these people out of poverty. We're going to start buying back the land and we want to redistribute this to some of the farmers and try to build up the wealth in the country for our people. The UFC goes not going to work for us, right. For our people, the UFC goes not going to work for us, right. So they go ahead and they reach out to the U? S and they say hey guys, communism looks like it's happening over here in Guatemala.
Victor:What communism threading my bananas.
Rob:Yeah, and they actually hired a PR company to put out all this communist agenda and they actually created a fake newspaper with all of their slander in it and distributed it to Congress. So what, the US does? They send in their best men, the CIA, and they basically just overthrow the Guatemalan government and put in their new leader, who is favorable to the US and the United Fruit Company. So they just said, listen, we can't stop the strikes, the governments and the United Fruit Company. So they just said, listen, we can't stop the strikes, the governments can't stop the strikes. So we put in a new government and we're going to have the US to help us. And they started to do this all the time.
Rob:Besides Guatemala one of the biggest issues that came out from this there was another country. There was a young political leader from a very wealthy family who lived in rural Cesar. Can you help me with this one? It's a Spanish country. I think it's pronounced Cuba, cuba, yeah. So this new guy, fidel Castro, decides to come up. I want to redistribute some of the land too. Did they own a lot in Cuba as well? They did own land in there too.
Victor:I didn't know Cuba was known for their bananas.
Rob:They were all over this region. So at the time, the United Fruit Company reaches out to the Secretary of State and the CIA director, who at the time were actually brothers, alan Dulles and John Foster Dulles Like the airport, maybe. So what does the US do?
Victor:Sending nukes? Now you have to get in there covertly. So what does the US do? Sending nukes? No, you have to get in there covertly and you have to root out the problem by putting in someone that likes.
Cesar:Bananas yes, I like a lot. You have to love bananas.
Victor:I don't trust anyone that doesn't like a banana. Yeah, I'm your man, I love bananas.
Rob:So this Red Scare actually led to the Bay of Pigs invasion. What the unsuccessful Bay of Pigs invasion? And guess who was exporting and bringing over arms and troops for the Bay of Pigs invasion? The United Fruit Company actually helped with the Bay of Pigs invasion.
Chris:Son of a bitch.
Rob:And because of that Fidel reaches out to Russia and they offer him nukes.
Cesar:Over some bananas, huh.
Rob:Wow, all over bananas.
Victor:Those are some crazy dots to connect. That's like some butterfly effect shit. Yeah, you know.
Rob:Yeah, interestingly enough, the Secretary of State that they reached out to was a partner at the United Fruit Company's law firm, and the CIA director used to be the board of trustees for the United Fruit Company.
Victor:That's the time. We should have had YouTubers back then.
Rob:Yeah, so with all these coup d'etats, the supply of bananas was actually starting to outpace the demand for bananas. So how do outpace the demand for bananas? So how do you increase the demand for something?
Victor:You have to start selling these people the idea of smoothies.
Chris:If.
Victor:Jamba Juice came onto the scene the demand would have been right back up again. And people are like these fruit smoothies are fucking amazing, it's so simple People in the US at the time.
Rob:Really they liked the taste of bananas. They didn't really know how to use them other than to eat them. The shape was unpleasant, so they used to sell them not within the skin, what and they would have them pre-sliced.
Chris:That's weird, that is weird.
Rob:Because people would eat bananas with a fork and knife. What so the United Fruit Company was like? We got to start teaching people how to use these bananas.
Victor:What posh kind of shit is this so?
Rob:they started a massive marketing campaign. They hired doctors to write in academic journals about bananas, talking about the health benefits I'm going to be right back babies and they pumped out all these things that we know and we do and I still put bananas in my cereal. All from the marketing from the united fruit company. They even branded a new mascot called miss chiquita in order to get people involved. And, oh wow, and knowing who the united fruit company was, later on the united fruit Company actually changed their name to Chiquita Banana in order to kind of stave off all of this bad press because of you know everything that was going on. Oh, wow.
Victor:They did some shit and they were like rebranding.
Rob:Yeah, rebrand, let's go ahead and do this.
Victor:Yes, the United Food Company evil, but Chiquita Banana huh guys. Hey, who wants to party? I'm fun. They fucked up Because, if they were smart, they did this whole rebranding thing. All they needed to do was introduce wheatgrass, and then the health boom would have started in the 60s. Instead, people are smoking their cigarettes and eating fucking bananas with a fork and knife.
Cesar:They were saying cigarettes are pretty good for you.
Victor:Yeah, like I'm smoking two packs of fucking Marlboro and fucking eating pre-cut bananas.
Rob:Well, Marlboro is the only brand that my doctor smokes.
Victor:I'm more of a Lucky Strike man myself.
Chris:Lucky Strikes is toasted.
Rob:So everything is looking good but, as we know from recent events, what is something that can completely derail a company, a government or even the entire world?
Rob:a virus a virus or a disease. All bananas are what they call monocultures, meaning they're technically clones of each other, and this is nice because you know that they're standard size, standard weight, standard taste. You don't have any irregularities and you can ship these things off very well. However, it's even great for fungi because as soon as they are able to tap into one of these fruits, they have the knowledge to tap into all of these fruits, because they're technically the same thing. So what came out was called the Panama disease, and the Panama disease was a fungus that, basically, was destroying banana crops all through.
Victor:Central America. I think I had the Panama disease.
Rob:It burns right you can't cure it with a pill.
Victor:Oh, okay, then I didn't have.
Rob:Z-Pak ain't getting rid of this thing. All right, did you get the shot? The popular banana that was being slung around the time the one that was at the World's Fair was actually called the Gros Michel, aka the Big Mike Banana.
Victor:Who's Mike, that is a terrible name.
Cesar:Yeah, that's a weird name, yeah.
Victor:I didn't call it that. What are you eating today?
Rob:I'm getting the Big Mike you know, it sounds like you're getting a breakfast. Let me get a Big Mike.
Victor:From a culture that was probably very homophobic at the time.
Cesar:Yes.
Victor:I don't know why they would put a Big Mike in their mouth.
Cesar:That would have been it for bananas.
Victor:Like all right next fruit.
Cesar:Look at kiwis.
Rob:This was said to be a very creamier, tasty version of the banana we actually know today, which is called the Cavendish banana, the Gros Michel. It doesn't exist anymore. There's only a few places that'll make it, but it is susceptible to panheuridia, so you can't really do it at a large scale.
Victor:Do they look different?
Rob:They looked very similar. Currently, there's over a thousand different types of bananas the Cavendish plantains, red bananas, apple bananas, burro bananas, and the list goes on and on. But the problem was they were running out of Gros Michel.
Victor:It's a French name, it's Michel, not.
Rob:Michelle, it's Gros Michel.
Victor:Gros Michel.
Rob:Yeah, it comes with a croissant. It was a French banana.
Victor:The banana is smoking a cigarette on the side.
Rob:Yes, Americans will eat me because they will love my taste. Yeah, pairs well with a Chianti. So they had to find a replacement, something that would match it in color. No seeds, similar tastes. A man named Sir Joseph Paxton. He was a gardener and botanist for the 6th Duke of Devonshire named William Cavendish. He was playing around with bananas and seeds and out comes the Cavendish banana. The Cavendish banana looked very, very, very similar to the Gros Michel, had a very similar taste, and so the banana company said all right, we'll just swap it. They probably won't even notice. And that's exactly what they did. When was this swapped? So? In the 1950s you had the Panama disease, and that's when all these companies were searching for replacements. The best part was it was resistant to the panama disease and they just went with it. But now, in modern day time, the panama disease is back yes and it's coming for our cavendish, let's go.
Rob:So the panama omitron 19 or whatever they're calling it, um updated version of the Panama disease. They actually started finding the Panama disease in the Philippines. The problem with the Panama disease is that it's actually not detectable. You can't go out there and start to see that these things are starting to rot or whatever. They just go down.
Victor:So what does it do to the banana? Does it make it rot faster?
Rob:The problem is to stop the spreading you have to basically burn your entire plantation. And so if you have one little bit, you have to get rid of all that land. You lose all those bananas.
Chris:Is that harmful to the humans, though, like the panama disease?
Victor:oh, I don't know who cares yeah, chris fucking ask a real question.
Rob:I'm almost done.
Victor:I'm almost done you didn't even watch the last of us. I don't even know why you're asking that question.
Rob:Fungi can alter our very minds just recently, about a year or two ago, it has come up in colombia, peru, and they believe it's very close to ecuador, nice, which is right now one of the largest exporters of bananas in the us oh boy so we are facing an extinction of the cavendish banana. As we know it, an extinction level event you guys think of what I'm thinking Business idea.
Victor:What's the business idea?
Rob:Go to school. For botany create a new banana. Yes In 20 years we'll have a new banana.
Victor:If they can come up with new bananas, like back in the day, and now we have, we can like, we can cross, breed it with a salmon and have like a swimming super banana. Why wouldn't it be easier to just figure this out now?
Rob:they are. They're currently actually working on that who's working on that?
Victor:I want names, damn it. I want to know who it is.
Rob:I'm gonna contact them I believe that these uh, the banana we have now is actually modified as it is for extra nutrients and durability and stuff like that. Because the cavendish has a slightly softer peel. The Gros Michel was a little more durable, had a thicker peel and a little more durable for transport, so they had to make some changes to the Cavendish and now they're looking to modify this thing completely so that they can try to get a resistant version of it.
Victor:The infection causes a self-defense mechanism of the host plant, causing it to secrete gel. So when your bananas start gelling, they've been infected by the Panama disease, which makes it so much worse.
Rob:It's just a lubed up banana. It's like if Diddy was eating a banana.
Chris:You sure this isn't Diddy? When you guys do eat bananas, do you guys eat multiple bananas at a time or just one?
Rob:I'm good with one. What the fuck? How many bananas do you eat?
Chris:Do you pretend the?
Victor:banana is something else? No, I can only do half.
Chris:I can only do half or one, I can't do multiple Half of a banana.
Cesar:I can only do half or one. I can't do multiple Half of a banana. Who eats half of a banana? What a waste?
Chris:No, because the texture of it.
Victor:Of a banana.
Chris:Yeah, it gets like I don't know something about it. I start like gag, so I'm like okay, I can't.
Victor:Are you chewing it or just throwing it down your throat? I am chewing it.
Chris:What are you doing, I'm eating the banana.
Cesar:I'm going to make sure this is clear.
Chris:I am chewing the damn bananas. Chris are you okay, it's the texture.
Victor:It's the texture, no this makes perfect sense now. This makes perfect sense now of why that company had to come out with a marketing plan of how to eat bananas.
Cesar:Because people like Chris are clearly eating it incorrectly how do you choke on a banana again?
Chris:I'm chewing my bananas, okay this isn't.
Victor:You're not eating it like you would at a at a truck stop, okay how does this guy eat a hot dog?
Cesar:what is wrong with you?
Rob:I was reading that they said that, like Colombia and all these countries, actually the reason why they're still stuck in these like states of government is long-term effects of what the United Fruit Company actually did to these governments.
Victor:No, it's because of the hot climate. No one likes to work.
Rob:Mmm, that too, yeah, they're just lazy. I'm just kidding. We love Colombia.
Cesar:These so-called underdeveloped countries. Right, when you start digging back, you're like, oh, they're underdeveloped for a reason. Yeah, because the countries were actually rich. One in there took their resources, screwed it up and they're like, yeah, don't go to that.
Rob:It's like Avatar. Yeah, all for bananas.
Victor:I need my bananas though.
Rob:I do too.
Victor:They are the quintessential ingredient of my protein shakes.
Cesar:Oh, yeah, yes.
Rob:You can't have a protein shake without a banana. It tastes like shit. You can't do water.
Cesar:And if you're, chris, as you're choking on, half of it you can make I, I chew my bananas, okay yeah, you say that a lot for someone who doesn't chew yeah, now you're just getting weirdly defensive about it.
Victor:What?
Rob:are you doing? Yeah, okay, all right guys, what do you think? He's? Some key takeaways victor, listen, we.
Victor:We had a long history of interfering with other countries and these companies are complete assholes for doing what they did. But it's still kind of sad to know that me eating bananas is probably going to end up me being one of the zombies from the Last of Us, so that's kind of upsetting. It wasn't flour, it was bananas all along.
Rob:Chris.
Chris:Honestly, I didn't know banana has such a dark history behind it. But I definitely see it differently now. You know it's not just banana anymore.
Rob:So Cesar.
Cesar:You know what? I am not going to change my eating habits at all. I understand now that Chiquita has a very dark history, but, other than tasting bananas out there, we eat them every week and, unfortunately, you could probably go in any of these products that you're eating every day and you're like you don't know the history. You don't know half of it. So you know it's sad and um, like I said earlier, earlier we've seen this story play out time and time again and it's going to continue to play out time and time again, but bananas are still tasty, man, I vote for bananas.
Rob:All right. Well, that's all for today. Thank you for tuning in and don't forget to follow us on Instagram, twitter and YouTube at I'm Not Dumb, but where we post extra fun content you may not find on the podcast. And, before you go, hit the subscribe button because you'll feel better. Trust me, until next time, stay curious.
Chris:Laters.
